Heavenletter #4965 Where Is Your Heart Going?, June 29, 2014

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gretchen3God said:
Listen to My Voice and not those repeated whispers in your head. You attack yourself with your repeated thoughts of defeat. When you think of defeat, losing, being at a disadvantage, you see a competition of some kind going on. If you feel loss, you also feel there is something to gain. Perhaps you are in a business deal gone wrong. You feel that you gave too much trust, and that you have been duped on purpose or caught in the tide. You may feel that you are at the point where you must walk away, that you can’t keep elaborating over and over again on this relationship that has gone wrong, be it a business arrangement or marriage.

Either way, you feel ravaged. You are thinking in terms of perpetrator and victim again, of yourself as the good guy victim and the other as the bad guy assailer. You feel justified to feel as you do, and so you make yourself a perpetrator of protest and all the accompanying hard feelings.

How do you get out of the arena of hard feelings? Where is your heart going? You have let yourself get into the “they can’t do that” mode, that “they can’t do this to me,” and you tie yourself in knots. You feel there is unkindness here. You may feel that your honor has been taken away from you. Instead of the trust you had, you feel betrayal. You had an idea, and now you have a different idea, and now you batter yourself with this appalling idea.

Whatever another party has done or not done, by design or by falling into it, you feel painted into a corner. It is this being cornered that leads to your feeling so abject, even as in hindsight, you see how you contributed to this now seeming fraud. You closed your eyes, and you fell into it. You let go of responsibility for yourself. If you were lead astray, you lead yourself astray. If you have been conned, you conned yourself. You are not the totally innocent party. You played a part.

What is before you now is to get away from sense of blame of the other and sense of blame of yourself. You have to get away from this preoccupation because it doesn’t get you anywhere you want to go. You want to get out of this morass of powerlessness you find yourself in. You have to get away from your own feelings of powerlessness and its willing partner, blame.

You thought you were loved, and now you feel stood up. Whether in business or personal life, you had an understanding that didn’t hold up, and, yet, you were a party to it.

Perhaps it is that you see yourself as a fool and this is what is intolerable to you. You don’t know how to walk away from your involvement and your own emotions. Whatever your situation, you may feel like a husband or a wife whose partner has been unfaithful. This may be a long-held pattern in your life. Someone was unfaithful to one degree or another. Someone did not hold up to the promise you held in your heart that another would be true to you forever. This was your premise. Stated or not, this was your premise. This is what “they can’t do this to me” means. No matter how unfair a situation may seem to be, beloveds, this word “me” speaks of ego. Will the real culprit stand up?

Regardless of the world reality of a situation, you are piqued, and the human mind makes pique justified. Justification isn’t the issue. How are you going to extricate yourself now from all the energy you are putting into this – this is the issue. When will you get away from these emotions that hold you back?

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